(Kanda's a fast healer, drinking had never been an issue before - except.. the last time he over did it back home and realized, for the first time, what a hangover was. It was absolutely terrible and he didn't intend on putting himself through any unnecessary predicaments such as that. He intends to pour himself just one cup of wine and plans to only have that.
Kanda gently huffs through a smirk as Todoroki comes over to help. He watches him retrieve the glasses and as soon as the other sets the glasses down, Kanda reaches out to grip the man's wrist. His eyes settle on Todoroki's.)
[The touch to his wrist causes him to freeze after he's set down the glasses. He's flustered enough by the contact and the bit of chroma just from the touch that he glances away from making eye contact, but manages to nod.]
Alright...I think I'll have the wine, then. [He speaks quietly, daring another look at Kanda as he allows him to take care of it. Even when the hand is no longer on his wrist he feels the lingering warmth from the touch on his skin, or it's his imagination and he's losing his mind.]
(Kanda's left with his hand upturned and his eyes downcast to his palm. He felt it too. He felt it the chroma. It felt good, it felt warm, and he felt his body respond in an unfamiliar way that was more welcomed than he would have thought he'd ever feel after touching someone. What possessed him to touch Todoroki was likely the same thing that lingered beneath his flesh after having touched the other man. An urge to feel another one rather than avoid of one of their basic needs here. Like water, food, sleep, touch was another need they had.
Kanda was dumbfounded for a good moment before he lowered his hand and looked to the wine bottle with a heavy frown. Touching an object like this wasn't at all as appetizing as touching Todoroki's flesh.)
Wait..
(He turns his head toward the large man, then stalks forward to close the space between them. His hand reaches out again, but he doesn't touch Todoroki, instead he waits to see if the other will initiate the touch on his own.)
[For a moment Enji's concerned that he's done something wrong because Kanda stopped what he's doing and seems to be looking at the hand that was just touching his. Had he forgotten to make his skin a suitable temperature? Did he burn the other man's hand by mistake?
And then he speaks again before Enji can apologize.]
What's wrong?
[Enji looks at the hand extended to him, and he feels no need to take it outside of wanting to feel that slow chroma generation. He's not sure if it's appropriate, or if he would do something like that normally. Still, since Kanda holds out his hand he reaches out to take it carefully. Because of his fire abilities his skin is warmer than average, and the warm pleasant feeling of chroma building makes it just a bit warmer.
He's not used to this, and he's not sure how long to keep their hands pressed together.]
(Kanda receives the touch, intending to hold his own palm against Todoroki's. He can feel warmth against his skin, it's not something that strikes up concern or interest outside the particular sense of the chroma tingling beneath his flesh-- or between both of their skin. From himself to Todoroki or from the other man to Kanda. His eyes watch the hands as if the more he stared the more he would be able to interpret what was happening.
He wasn't confident he understood this response and though it may be unique to this world, he can't help but wonder if some of the scientists back home might have a better explanation for what is happening between Todoroki and himself. As if it were yet to be discovered - a better way in connecting with one another, a more efficient way? Or did this make things more complicated?
This was the first time he'd held onto someone here, like this, purposely for this alone. Todoroki was the only person here he felt safe enough to do so, in any case. Kanda finally pulls his hand back and his fingertips purposely draw down the other man's larger hand and pinch together in a caress at the center of Todoroki's palm. He pulls his hand back then, his forefinger and thumb pressed together, and he looks at his fingers, as if he was pulling a thread from the other's flesh - but nothing was there, save for the residual feeling of the man's chroma.)
[The size of their hands are noticeably different, but his eyes leave the image of Kanda's hand pressed to his own to study his face instead. He's so focused on trying to analyze what's happening between their hands that soon Enji begins to wonder if perhaps he can sense something about it that no one else can.
He keeps quiet because he doesn't want to interrupt Kanda's focus, and his stare goes back to the smaller hand touching and exploring his palm. It feels nice to have this sort of contact. Like when Kanda touched his wrist just before but better. How much of that was because of the chroma and how much was something else? He doesn't want to think about it, so he pulls his hand away, making a fist with it and opening his hand again to look at it.]
I don't understand how it works. [He mumbles the words quietly after a moment, still feeling residual heat on his palm. It doesn't feel bad, but he doesn't want to allow himself to admit that he enjoyed it either. At least it had been with Kanda and not anyone else he wouldn't trust to make contact with.]
(Kanda softly nods, he doesn't know either. It was probably obvious from the dumb way he's staring at his hand. As if answers were going to start flashing between his fingers or across his palm. It didn't have to make sense to Kanda, did it?
For a moment he forgets what he's doing so he brings his eyes up to stare at Todoroki instead. He's lost in the bewilderment of it all, how could a world collect so many different people from so many different worlds or parallel universes, or even timelines on the same world? It was enough thought to encourage the overwhelming stupor he feels for being lost in the thick of it.
Wine.. right.
Kanda breaks the stare and lowers his attention to his task at hand: it's simple, it's manageable, it's far more kind than trying to draw any sense of their position here, their meaning of life here.
Once he fills a glass full he immediately brings it to his lips and drinks the room-temperature liquor. It goes down smoothly and sweetly. It's about as much as he can tolerate, anything sweeter would be too much.)
[And almost as quickly as it began, the tension in the air seems to pass. Even as it does he can feel the pressure of Kanda's eyes staring at him, and meets his gaze for a moment longer until they look away from each other soon after.
Yes, the wine. It slipped his mind as well.]
Thank you.
[Just as soon as his gets poured, Enji does the same. It warms him up on the way down. Adding fuel for the fire he could burn if he wanted to. But there's no need for flames here when he's safe at home and in good company. He thinks Kanda is better company that he could have hoped for. Even at home he had very few people he could trust this much.]
(He was curious to the moonlacing, but momentarily satisfied with the phenomenon he just experienced with it. Although, he couldn't help but wonder if most of it was in his head. If this whole warmth, sensation, and tingling response within his body was only just feeding a fiction of what to expect when touching another.
He knew better, however, this wasn't something he could will away because it was uncomfortable. It was more uncomfortable due to the fact that he felt as if he had no control over it, like he would eventually need to have skin on skin contact. For the longest time he only counted on himself, on his own power, on his own ability to heal and recover.
This world told him he needed others. He needed Todoroki - which wasn't too far off the mark, seeing as how he's come to depend on him so much already.
Kanda idled with the glass of wine, sipping every so often, while his thoughts came and went.)
[Even if they weren't discussing it at length, Enji can tell that they have similar feelings toward it. A thing that they're told is meant to help them heal and generate energy is the same thing giving power to those keeping them there. It's suspicious, he doesn't trust it, but it doesn't seem to feel as bad as he wishes it did.
Maybe refusing it was not going to be possible forever, and when that happened who would it be with What would the circumstances be like? Enji frowns and sips his drink as well. There were very few people here that he trusted enough to entertain that thought with, but Kanda was slowly inching his way up that short list.]
(Kanda agrees by taking another sip from his glass. He sets it down and softly hums for a noise of confirmation that he agreed. His eyes were mostly between his hand and Todoroki's. It was moments like this that he was left thinking about that he never really had to think about before.
His usual response to someone who brushed past him, touched him, put their hands on him was to move away from that contact - but he didn't really sit for long in thought about the transgression. Here, however, it was undeniably something on the forefront of his mind. It wasn't just touching, either, it was the encouragement of kissing, copulating, being so intimately physical with one another. As if something like that was easy to do - was it easy?
Kanda wasn't normal even in his culture by a long shot, an artificial human raised in a fish tank until he was nine years of age. He's only been on his feet for about a decade - and his time was pretty much all focused on the Black Order's agenda. He sat there for some time, lost in his thoughts, a common space Todoroki would have recognized Kanda to be in by now.)
[He's never sure what Kanda is thinking about when he becomes silent, but he doesn't mind it. Sometimes people needed time alone with their thoughts and feelings to figure things out. Maybe because he's doing the same thing.
He considers his options for realistically managing to survive in a place that requires such things, and at some point he will have to do some form of moonlacing, but hopefully it won't be forced on him. After a long slow breath he takes another drink from his glass and glances at his new room mate again. He still seems very deep in thought, so without prompting he takes the bottle to pour just a bit more wine into each glass. Just a bit more before bed seemed alright.]
I shouldn't keep you away from other things you have planned. Thank you for eating with me, we'll do it again. Often, I hope.
(Todoroki's words are more efficient in striking Kanda's attention than the added wine to his glass. He grounds himself in the here and now by reaching for the glass and concentrating on the feel of the smooth texture and cool atmosphere of the circumference that holds the wine. He looks to Todoroki and glances down to the other's lips as he repeats the older man's words.)
Yes.
(He brings his eyes up to the other's and looks between them before he settled his eyes on the red hair. His lips part just enough for a breath before he speaks again.)
I can prepare our next meal.
(He then finds himself wanting to warn the other:)
Though, it may be bland to your palate.. so.. if you would tell me the seasoning you prefer I can incorporate them in the preparation.
[Enji is pleased enough to hear that Kanda is not opposed to doing something like this again, but the offer to do the cooking next time comes as a bit of a surprise to him though he doesn't show it in his expression. Instead he looks down at the younger man's hands, then back up to his face that always seems to be framed perfectly by his dark hair.]
If you prepare it the way you like, I'll eat it as it is. You don't need to do anything special for me.
[Unless this is Kanda's way of pointing out that he's not much of a cook. In that case Enji will put on a convincing face and try to enjoy it anyway.] I don't usually cook, so I'm not sure I can give you very good help, but I will eat it and be grateful. [He offers, allowing himself to smile for just a moment at the thought.]
(The response to Kanda's willingness to offer such a gesture was encouraging enough to Kanda that he felt satisfied and even excited to prepare something for Todoroki. As if this was a whole new and exciting language he had only just learned with the other. Although, this idea really wasn't far from the truth. He didn't have traditional friends back home, he didn't have notions such as cooking for one another, doing something "nice" for one another, it was more like everyone had their role and those he was with either worked well with him or .. didn't. He was also accustomed to losing those around him without any notice, without any sign of old age before their departure.
Maybe this was foolish of him and doubt began to sour the previous warmth in his chest. He had no real idea when he would lose Todoroki here. To death, to another arrangement (living or.. perhaps for some reason they would go their separate ways) or .. Todoroki would return home.
Kanda kept these thoughts to himself and his eyes remained downcast to his wine and the food before him. It wasn't often Kanda had something he cherished stay with him for long term.)
[Enji's not sure at what point he'd gotten so comfortable with watching Kanda so closely. He's been able to see various changes in mood and expression depending on what he must be thinking about even without knowing at all what was on the younger man's mind. At some point he'd learned to spot moments where he's past the point of just deep thought and has gone somewhere that appears to be emotionally troubling.
So at the first signs of concern or worry on Kanda's face, Enji hopes he's not stepping out of line when he asks if there's something troubling him.]
What's on your mind? You seem sad. [He rests a hand on the younger man's shoulder, radiating warmth in case that might be comforting.]
(Kanda glances up to the other. His lips part before he draws in a breath and he closes them as his eyes focus on Todoroki's. He shakes his head gently. He can't quite recall what he was thinking of previous of Todoroki's comment. He does consider, however, that he always looks this way. Angry or sad. Mostly angry - or so he's been told. Kanda swallows and his eyes move across Todoroki's face.)
Everything is alright.
(The hand on his shoulder acts as a anchor and Kanda finds himself concentrating on the weight of the hand on him and how it feels as the warmth transcends beneath his clothing to his skin.)
[When Kanda says that, he takes his word for it. It doesn't mean he won't worry, but it does mean he'll try to appear less concerned. His hand moves up the younger man's shoulder a little distance to allow his thumb to brush over the skin at the side of Kanda's neck. Just below his jaw.
As soon as Enji realizes what he's doing he lifts his hand away to fall to his side again.]
I should get some sleep. So should you. Goodnight. [The words come out almost in a hurry so he can turn away to return to the safety of his room, but not before pauses to add:] Thank you again for you company tonight.
(Kanda can feel a heat rise from his stomach up to his face as Todoroki moves his fingers against his flesh. His lips part and a breath comes out between them with a quiver. He feels alarm as soon as Todoroki pulls back and he reciprocates a soft, "goodnight" before the other leaves.
Kanda stays seated for a moment as he considers the experience of touch on one another. The hand holding and the brush of Todoroki's fingers across his skin. Would it have felt different if he wasn't anticipating something pleasant already? Was it more of the moonlacing business or was it because Kanda wanted it to feel nice - or was that out of his control as well?
He continued to ponder on this as he cleans up the table, the kitchen, and puts the dishes away. He'll retreat in his room for the night as well and see what tomorrow brings.)
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Kanda gently huffs through a smirk as Todoroki comes over to help. He watches him retrieve the glasses and as soon as the other sets the glasses down, Kanda reaches out to grip the man's wrist. His eyes settle on Todoroki's.)
Let me.
no subject
Alright...I think I'll have the wine, then. [He speaks quietly, daring another look at Kanda as he allows him to take care of it. Even when the hand is no longer on his wrist he feels the lingering warmth from the touch on his skin, or it's his imagination and he's losing his mind.]
no subject
Kanda was dumbfounded for a good moment before he lowered his hand and looked to the wine bottle with a heavy frown. Touching an object like this wasn't at all as appetizing as touching Todoroki's flesh.)
Wait..
(He turns his head toward the large man, then stalks forward to close the space between them. His hand reaches out again, but he doesn't touch Todoroki, instead he waits to see if the other will initiate the touch on his own.)
no subject
And then he speaks again before Enji can apologize.]
What's wrong?
[Enji looks at the hand extended to him, and he feels no need to take it outside of wanting to feel that slow chroma generation. He's not sure if it's appropriate, or if he would do something like that normally. Still, since Kanda holds out his hand he reaches out to take it carefully. Because of his fire abilities his skin is warmer than average, and the warm pleasant feeling of chroma building makes it just a bit warmer.
He's not used to this, and he's not sure how long to keep their hands pressed together.]
no subject
He wasn't confident he understood this response and though it may be unique to this world, he can't help but wonder if some of the scientists back home might have a better explanation for what is happening between Todoroki and himself. As if it were yet to be discovered - a better way in connecting with one another, a more efficient way? Or did this make things more complicated?
This was the first time he'd held onto someone here, like this, purposely for this alone. Todoroki was the only person here he felt safe enough to do so, in any case. Kanda finally pulls his hand back and his fingertips purposely draw down the other man's larger hand and pinch together in a caress at the center of Todoroki's palm. He pulls his hand back then, his forefinger and thumb pressed together, and he looks at his fingers, as if he was pulling a thread from the other's flesh - but nothing was there, save for the residual feeling of the man's chroma.)
no subject
He keeps quiet because he doesn't want to interrupt Kanda's focus, and his stare goes back to the smaller hand touching and exploring his palm. It feels nice to have this sort of contact. Like when Kanda touched his wrist just before but better. How much of that was because of the chroma and how much was something else? He doesn't want to think about it, so he pulls his hand away, making a fist with it and opening his hand again to look at it.]
I don't understand how it works. [He mumbles the words quietly after a moment, still feeling residual heat on his palm. It doesn't feel bad, but he doesn't want to allow himself to admit that he enjoyed it either. At least it had been with Kanda and not anyone else he wouldn't trust to make contact with.]
no subject
For a moment he forgets what he's doing so he brings his eyes up to stare at Todoroki instead. He's lost in the bewilderment of it all, how could a world collect so many different people from so many different worlds or parallel universes, or even timelines on the same world? It was enough thought to encourage the overwhelming stupor he feels for being lost in the thick of it.
Wine.. right.
Kanda breaks the stare and lowers his attention to his task at hand: it's simple, it's manageable, it's far more kind than trying to draw any sense of their position here, their meaning of life here.
Once he fills a glass full he immediately brings it to his lips and drinks the room-temperature liquor. It goes down smoothly and sweetly. It's about as much as he can tolerate, anything sweeter would be too much.)
no subject
Yes, the wine. It slipped his mind as well.]
Thank you.
[Just as soon as his gets poured, Enji does the same. It warms him up on the way down. Adding fuel for the fire he could burn if he wanted to. But there's no need for flames here when he's safe at home and in good company. He thinks Kanda is better company that he could have hoped for. Even at home he had very few people he could trust this much.]
no subject
He knew better, however, this wasn't something he could will away because it was uncomfortable. It was more uncomfortable due to the fact that he felt as if he had no control over it, like he would eventually need to have skin on skin contact. For the longest time he only counted on himself, on his own power, on his own ability to heal and recover.
This world told him he needed others. He needed Todoroki - which wasn't too far off the mark, seeing as how he's come to depend on him so much already.
Kanda idled with the glass of wine, sipping every so often, while his thoughts came and went.)
no subject
Maybe refusing it was not going to be possible forever, and when that happened who would it be with What would the circumstances be like? Enji frowns and sips his drink as well. There were very few people here that he trusted enough to entertain that thought with, but Kanda was slowly inching his way up that short list.]
The wine isn't bad. Thank you.
no subject
His usual response to someone who brushed past him, touched him, put their hands on him was to move away from that contact - but he didn't really sit for long in thought about the transgression. Here, however, it was undeniably something on the forefront of his mind. It wasn't just touching, either, it was the encouragement of kissing, copulating, being so intimately physical with one another. As if something like that was easy to do - was it easy?
Kanda wasn't normal even in his culture by a long shot, an artificial human raised in a fish tank until he was nine years of age. He's only been on his feet for about a decade - and his time was pretty much all focused on the Black Order's agenda. He sat there for some time, lost in his thoughts, a common space Todoroki would have recognized Kanda to be in by now.)
no subject
He considers his options for realistically managing to survive in a place that requires such things, and at some point he will have to do some form of moonlacing, but hopefully it won't be forced on him. After a long slow breath he takes another drink from his glass and glances at his new room mate again. He still seems very deep in thought, so without prompting he takes the bottle to pour just a bit more wine into each glass. Just a bit more before bed seemed alright.]
I shouldn't keep you away from other things you have planned. Thank you for eating with me, we'll do it again. Often, I hope.
no subject
Yes.
(He brings his eyes up to the other's and looks between them before he settled his eyes on the red hair. His lips part just enough for a breath before he speaks again.)
I can prepare our next meal.
(He then finds himself wanting to warn the other:)
Though, it may be bland to your palate.. so.. if you would tell me the seasoning you prefer I can incorporate them in the preparation.
no subject
If you prepare it the way you like, I'll eat it as it is. You don't need to do anything special for me.
[Unless this is Kanda's way of pointing out that he's not much of a cook. In that case Enji will put on a convincing face and try to enjoy it anyway.] I don't usually cook, so I'm not sure I can give you very good help, but I will eat it and be grateful. [He offers, allowing himself to smile for just a moment at the thought.]
I'll take care of the wine.
no subject
Maybe this was foolish of him and doubt began to sour the previous warmth in his chest. He had no real idea when he would lose Todoroki here. To death, to another arrangement (living or.. perhaps for some reason they would go their separate ways) or .. Todoroki would return home.
Kanda kept these thoughts to himself and his eyes remained downcast to his wine and the food before him. It wasn't often Kanda had something he cherished stay with him for long term.)
no subject
So at the first signs of concern or worry on Kanda's face, Enji hopes he's not stepping out of line when he asks if there's something troubling him.]
What's on your mind? You seem sad. [He rests a hand on the younger man's shoulder, radiating warmth in case that might be comforting.]
no subject
Everything is alright.
(The hand on his shoulder acts as a anchor and Kanda finds himself concentrating on the weight of the hand on him and how it feels as the warmth transcends beneath his clothing to his skin.)
fin?
As soon as Enji realizes what he's doing he lifts his hand away to fall to his side again.]
I should get some sleep. So should you. Goodnight. [The words come out almost in a hurry so he can turn away to return to the safety of his room, but not before pauses to add:] Thank you again for you company tonight.
Yes β₯
Kanda stays seated for a moment as he considers the experience of touch on one another. The hand holding and the brush of Todoroki's fingers across his skin. Would it have felt different if he wasn't anticipating something pleasant already? Was it more of the moonlacing business or was it because Kanda wanted it to feel nice - or was that out of his control as well?
He continued to ponder on this as he cleans up the table, the kitchen, and puts the dishes away. He'll retreat in his room for the night as well and see what tomorrow brings.)